Review Archive: Eastern Promises - It's A Boy Girl Thing

Eastern Promises
Eastern Promises is a very solid movie. Like some of the other reviewers here, I also kind of got the feeling that something was missing. Really strange. Anyway, Mortensen is great in this one. He's very convincing as Nikolai. And in a scene that's sure to delight the ladies, Little Viggo even makes an appearance in what has to be the most bizarre fight scene I've ever witnessed.

Eastern Promises is recommended.


Enchanted
Enchanted was an excellent surprise. Sure, I'd heard good reviews but I really wasn't expecting much going into it. I figured that it was going to be pretty silly. I'm amazed at how wrong I was. I was sucked right in at the very opening. The story was something we've seen countless times before, yet something about this particular retelling was more engaging. The cast was great. Patrick Dempsey and James Marsden were really good as Giselle's suitors. And Amy Adams was beyond cute as Giselle. Her wide-eyed innocence really made her the perfect live action princess.

Enchanted lived up to its name. It comes highly recommended.

The Entity
The Entity is based on the (allegedly) true story of a California woman who was attacked continually by an unseen force.

This one almost had me. It started off really strong. The first attack was freaking intense. It came out of nowhere. The music in the scene was jarring, daring you to pay attention. That was all I needed to see...I was hooked. And then something happened. I'm still not quite sure what really. Maybe it was the length of the movie. Clocking in at 125 minutes, it probably could have trimmed a solid 20 minutes and been a much better film. Instead, I lost interest and found myself waiting for it to end. Regardless of that, Barbara Hershey turns in a solid performance as the perpetually tortured woman. She's not one of my favorites, but she's good here.

The Entity starts strong but loses momentum due to its length. If you're a genre fan, it might be worth a rental just so you can check it out before the inevitable remake comes along.

Eraser
Eraser is your typical, big dumb action flick. Schwarzenegger starred in a slew of them in the 80s and 90s so if you've seen one, you've pretty much seen them all. Like most of his flicks though, his charisma propels this a bit further than it would if it starred someone else.

This one has him starring as John Kruger, a US Marshall who works with the Witness Protection Program. He has to protect Vanessa Williams, a corporate executive who has uncovered some dirt on her bosses. Dirt that will get her killed. The story here is decent at best, pretty far from original. The action more than makes up for it though with some pretty cool sequences. There's some comic relief provided by the late Robert Pastorelli that moves us along when there's a lull in the action. The cast here is solid with the aforementioned folks plus James Caan, James Coburn and, most likely, some other folks named James. Or not.

Eraser is worth a watch. Give it a rent or check it out on cable.



Fido
Fido is set in the small town of Willard, circa the 1950s. Radioactive waste from outer space has brought the dead back to life and started the great Zombie War. Eventually, Dr. Geiger, the founder of Zomcon figures out how to make the dead stay dead. After the war is won by the humans, Geiger creates a device to help domesticate any remaining zombies. Fido is one of those domesticated ones.

This is a decent movie. It doesn't live up to the amount of hype I'd heard going in however. It's similar to Shaun of the Dead in that there's quite a bit comedy mixed in with the zombies and gory bits. The story is interesting because it's something that really hasn't done before. The cast is solid with newcomer K'Sun Ray doing really well as Timmy.

This one is worthwhile for zombie fans to check out. Otherwise, it's only worth a rental.

Fingerprints
Fingerprints tells the story of a young girl, fresh out of rehab, who rejoins her family in a small town that was the home of a tragic accident many years before.

For a direct-to-video flick, Fingerprints has a few things going for it. First up is the cast. While they are not spectacular, they are pretty solid. Lou Diamond Phillips is probably the biggest name in this one and he turns in a good performance. Leah Pipes and Kristin Cavallari are both solid as sisters Melanie and Crystal. The story in this one is interesting enough to hold your attention. It does start to slow down in the middle but picks back up, before building a good head of steam for the conclusion.

Now, the bad. While most of the cast is solid, there are a couple of performances here that wind up going way over the top. And not in a good way. Next up is the inclusion of a character that looks like a cross between Tom Hanks in The Polar Express and Daniel Plainview from There Will Be Blood. It's tough to take a character seriously when you can't get those images out of your mind. Also, the epilogue at the end feels really cheesy and kind of tacked on.

Fingerprints is strictly average. If you're a genre fan, it might be worth a cheap rental.


Fool's Gold
Fool's Gold tells the story of a newly divorced couple who wind up on a treasure hunt to find a fortune that disappeared in the Caribbean in the 1700s.

For what is basically a chick flick, Fool's Gold was quite a surprise. There was a lot more action and adventure than I was expecting. The story here is quite interesting, as I've always been fascinated with lost treasure and things of that nature. The action keeps the movie moving at a nice pace and held my attention easily. McConaughey just comes across really well on-screen usually and this is no exception. His charm makes the character more likable than he has any business being. And Kate Hudson is solid here. And she's stunning. Always a plus.

Fool's Gold is recommended. It'll keep the woman in your life happy and has enough action to satisfy you as well.


Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Forgetting Sarah Marshall is the latest flick brought to us by one of the hottest producers of the moment, Judd Apatow.

It tells the story of Peter, who gets dumped by his actress girlfriend Sarah Marshall. He decides to take a vacation to a Hawaiian resort in an attempt to get over her only to find that she's vacationing at the same resort. With her new boyfriend,no less.

First and foremost, this is a very funny movie. As is to be expected with most of Apatow's productions. Jason Segel is the writer (and star) here and he turned out a winner with this script. Anyone who's been dumped can relate to seeing the ex out on the town with a new significant other and the pain it can cause. The awkwardness between Peter and Sarah is near-painful at some points while still being extremely funny. As the lead, Segel makes the character of Peter very likable. His charm shows through and makes you cheer for him to find a happy ending. Kristen Bell plays Sarah and she's very solid here. She runs the gamut of emotions here and does quite well. For me, Mila Kunis was the real highlight of this one. Playing Rachel, the front desk clerk at the resort, she's great. She comes across as kind of the beautiful girl next door. Laid back, friendly and insanely gorgeous, she shines here. The supporting cast here is very good as well.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall is highly recommended.


Frontier(s)
Frontier(s) is another excellent horror flick coming from the land of wine and cheese. I don't know what's in the water over there but they're producing some of the best horror out there at the moment.

Frontier(s) is solid, all the way around. The cast is good, the story goes along at a brisk pace and sucks you right in. This is one of those rare foreign flicks that makes you forget they're not even speaking English. The gore in this unrated edition is top-notch, including a scene with a shotgun that, in my opinion, rivals Tom Savini's blast in Maniac as one of the all-time best.

Frontier(s) is highly recommended. Seriously. Check it out.


Funny Games
Funny Games is a shot-by-shot remake of the 1997 film of the same name. Michael Haneke directed both.

Funny Games tells the story of a family out for a vacation at their lake house. Two strange young men come to visit under the premise that they need to borrow eggs for the family they're staying with. The truth is eventually revealed to be much darker than that. The acting in this one is top-notch. Pitt and Corbet are genuinely creepy and menacing in their roles as the visitors. Roth and Watts are good as the husband and wife whose lives are at stake. The story sucks you in and doesn't let up until the end credits roll.

Like others have said, Funny Games is not intended to be entertaining. It's intended to be a statement. This movie delivers on that in a big way. It disturbs you. It gets into your head and takes up residence. Even some two weeks after watching this, it's still fresh in my mind.

Funny Games is highly recommended.


Georgia Rule
Georgia Rule is a chick flick. Since chick flicks really aren't my cup of tea, this one kind of surprised me a bit. It was definitely better than I was expecting it to be. It's not a great movie but it was surprisingly decent. Lohan turns in a good performance as Rachel. Most critics say she was essentially playing a version of herself and I can see where they'd get that from. She starts off as a spoiled brat who genuinely can't tell the difference between fact and fiction and winds up finding redemption.

If you like chick flicks, give Georgia Rule a shot. If not, skip it.


Ghost Rider
Ghost Rider was alright. It was better than I was expecting. But then, that's easy to do when my expectations are dragging on the floor. The CGI stuff with Ghost Rider was pretty cool looking, all things considered. The cast was decent enough. Not really a big Wes Bentley fan though and felt that he wasn't nearly as intimidating as he should have been given the character he was playing.

Ghost Rider is one of those flicks that you can take it or leave it. If you're into movies based on comics, check it out. If not, you're better off skipping it.


Grandma's Boy
Grandma's Boy is downright hilarious. There are so many parts that made me laugh hysterically that I actually had to go back and re-watch the scenes after for fear I'd missed something. Particularly Alex's scene with Lara Croft...good stuff. The leads here are well cast and great in their performances. Linda Cardellini totally won me over with her performance of Push It.

Highly recommended.


Hack!
Hack! is quite a bit of fun. Sure, it can be cheesy at times but that adds to the charm. Take a decent cast, some nice gore and some winks to other horror flicks and you've got a movie that's a good way to pass a couple of hours. All that being said, my main reason for purchasing this at the time was to ogle Danica McKellar, formerly of The Wonder Years. I had a hell of a crush on her while I was younger and wanted to see how she'd held up. Answer? Pretty freaking well. She's smoking hot.

Hack! is recommended if you're a fan of genre flicks.


Hard Candy
Hard Candy is a great movie. It is intense, engaging and keeps you on the edge of your seat. Patrick Wilson and Ellen Page are excellent as the two leads and focal points of the movie. They play off of each other perfectly. The tension mounts before building to an unforgettable climax.

Hard Candy is an excellent psychological thriller. It comes highly recommended.


Hard Eight
Hard Eight is acclaimed director Paul Thomas Anderson's debut film. He'd done a couple of shorts prior to this, but this was his first feature length effort.

This is a very good movie. Considering that it's Anderson's debut, it's surprisingly solid. With a cast like he has to work with, anything less would be a disappointment. Philip Baker Hall, John C. Reilly, Gwyneth Paltrow and Samuel L Jackson all turn in great performances here. Particularly Hall and Reilly. Both just excellent work. The story is not exactly fast paced but it's gripping nonetheless.

Hard Eight is recommended.


Hard Rain
Hard Rain is a decent action flick. It's one of those movies that really isn't "good" but also not terrible. Best word I can think of to describe it is "entertaining". The cast is solid, the story is decent and the action moves along at a nice pace.

Hard Rain is worth the cost of a rental.


Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay
Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay is the follow-up to 2004's successful stoner comedy Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle.

Before watching this one, I'd heard a lot of negative things. Most people seemed to think that it wasn't very funny or not nearly as good as the original. Well, I really liked it. Perhaps it was because I had a bad day at work and needed a good laugh. Maybe it was just really funny. A second viewing down the road will be needed to determine that. At any rate, I found this to be quite enjoyable. Cho and Penn are great in their roles. Some of Cho's facial expressions and manner in which he said things were just hilarious. Rob Corddry was over the top but amusing as the extremely racist Homeland Security agent trying to capture Harold and Kumar. Danneel Harris was stunning as Kumar's ex-girlfriend. The story here moved along at a good pace given the length of this unrated version.

I liked Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay enough to recommend checking it out.


Hostel Part II
Hostel Part II is the sequel to 2005's Hostel. It tells the story of 3 college girls studying abroad. They wind up getting sidetracked into a trip to Slovakia where they wind up becoming victims of an exclusive murder-for-money club.

For the most part, this is pretty much a retelling of the original but with a sex change. The parts where this sequel excels are the "behind the scenes" stuff. Learning how the club works, the bidding system, etc are all fascinating and could definitely be expanded upon. It's when they focus on the 3 leads that the film lags a bit. Very slow going for the first 60 minutes or so showing the girls getting to Slovakia and being recruited. It's slow mainly because it's pretty much the same stuff as the original. Anyway, the cast here is good for the most part. I'm not a big Heather Matarazzo fan so the less screen time she gets, the happier I am. Her very presence on the screen annoys me so let's just say I was quite pleased with her story arc. The gore factor in this one is pretty high. Lots of gruesome stuff and a few cringe-worthy scenes as well.

Hostel Part II is recommended.


The Hottie and the Nottie
The Hottie and the Nottie is not as bad as everyone has made it out to be. At least, that is this reviewer's opinion. Sure, it's a dumb movie. And sure, it's pretty predictable as well. But I've definitely seen worse. Joel David Moore is enjoyable as the guy trying to woo Cristabelle, as played by the ubiquitous Paris Hilton. Moore seems as if he's having a good time and it comes across in his performance. There's not much for Hilton to do but stand around and look good . She can do that in her sleep so she comes off alright here. Christine Lakin as June or the titular "nottie" is good here. She's under a ton of makeup/prosthetics and shines through despite the appearance.

The Hottie and the Nottie is not for everyone. There are some funny scenes but let's face it, no one is watching this for the comedy. Even if you think it terrible, I still think this one's worth a rental.


Inside
Inside is an incredible movie. I'd heard a lot of hype regarding this one so I was hesitant to watch it. I'm glad I finally got around to it tonight. Inside has everything a horror fan could possibly ask for in a movie. A great atmosphere, ominous music, an intense story, solid acting and gore galore. It took roughly 30 minutes to set up what was going on and from there, the remaining time is spent providing balls-out action and a story that moves along so quickly with such intensity that it will move you to the edge of your seat.

Inside is one of the best horror movies I've seen in quite some time. It is highly recommended.


The Island
The Island is a futuristic sci-fi/action flick set in 2019. Survivors from a contamination live in a massive underground bunker to keep them safe. They hope to win The Lottery and make it to The Island, the only remaining place on Earth that wasn't affected by the contamination. Two of the residents discover that not everything is quite what it appears to be and escape.

The Island is a solid action flick. Clocking in at a bit over 2 hours, this one moves along at a solid pace. The acting from McGregor and Johansson is good as they play the two escapees. When I said in an earlier review to track down Scarlett in one of her better looking appearances, this is what I had in mind.
*drool*
Anyway, the story is typical sci-fi involving clones but there's a bit of a twist that makes it more interesting. The action sequences are fast paced and visually stimulating, typical of a Michael Bay flick.

The Island is recommended.


It's A Boy Girl Thing
It's A Boy Girl Thing is a rehash of your average body swap movie that was popular in the late 80s. It's a decent enough flick, if really nothing special. The biggest thing this one has going for it are the two leads, Samaire Armstrong and Kevin Zegers. Both are pretty solid in their roles. Armstrong is cute as hell and her mannerisms while in male mode are over-exaggerated but funny nonetheless.

This one might make a decent rental if you're a fan of this type of flick.